Thursday, April 4, 2019

Best time to go to Thailand: Liberty From A Xxx Yr Struggle

 I was therefore blessed to pass the lastly calendar week of April, 2017, at the Revelation Wellness Instructor Retreat, inwards beautiful Williams, Arizona. The retreat together with lessons learned along the way, were life-changing together with life-giving, inwards therefore many ways, together with receive got me good on my agency to a liberty that I never idea was possible. Freedom(n); the solid set down of non beingness imprisoned or enslaved. 

But, first, to a greater extent than or less background....I took my origin trip the calorie-free fantastic shape at the historic menses of 5 together with brutal caput over heels inwards honey amongst movement, music, performing... everything! I felt alive! I constitute my life-long passion every bit a 5 yr quondam together with never looked back. 
My origin trip the calorie-free fantastic recital. Age 5

I continued to trip the calorie-free fantastic through uncomplicated school, was selected for the junior high trip the calorie-free fantastic fellowship 2 years inwards a row, together with fifty-fifty served every bit trip the calorie-free fantastic fellowship president inwards ninth grade.
More trip the calorie-free fantastic recitals. Age 8

When I got to high school, I saw the drill squad perform together with was smitten. I knew I MUST brand the team. There was null to a greater extent than I wanted. I practiced for 2 years, didn't brand it my junior year, but finally made the squad for my senior year. I was over-the-moon amongst joy!
That's me inwards the real front, back-bending.

Dance was my life! But from my life's greatest passion together with joy, has also come upwards my life's biggest struggle. 
I'm inwards the back, center.

One solar daytime during a summertime do nosotros were called, i at a time, into our advisor's part for 'weigh-ins'. I initially didn't intend much nearly it until I stepped onto the scale together with was horrified at the number staring dorsum at me. 145 pounds. As our advisor recorded the number, I side glanced at the newspaper together with almost gasped every bit I read the weights of the others; 101, 123, 111.....it's the origin fourth dimension I ever idea "I'm fat". I didn't receive got the knowledge, every bit a xvi yr old, to argue that I was also at to the lowest degree vi inches taller than those girls. I got off the scale together with was randomly told to lose 10 pounds, together with excused from the office. 

No direction was given, no information on nutrition, simply "lose 10 pounds". I likely didn't fifty-fifty tell my parents the weigh-in happened, I simply laid nearly to lose the 10 pounds. I did non wishing to live benched for beingness besides fat. I couldn't live without my dancing.
That's me inwards the middle.

In social club to lose weight, I idea I should simply swallow less. I would start my solar daytime (a solar daytime that included upwards to 5 hours of dancing) amongst a loving cup of Yoplait yogurt together with perchance a banana, I picked at my tiffin together with would together with therefore swallow a normal dinner. I don't call back thinking I had an eating disorder, but I approximate perchance I did to to a greater extent than or less extent. I fifty-fifty lost my menses for nearly four months during that time. We never weighed inwards again, together with I'm non fifty-fifty certain if I lost the 10 pounds, but this i lawsuit inwards my past, has seat me on a path of slavery. The bondage of non beingness practiced enough.
I'm on the left. Really bad movie character inwards the 80"s!

Basically, I've been on a diet instantly for 30 years, together with I'm tired. So tired. I've tried; low-fat, high-fat, Eat-Clean Diet, diet pills, Weight Watchers (both online together with meetings), excessive exercise, low-carb, saccharide fasts, Paleo, Whole 30(x5), intermittent fasting, My Fitness Pal, Slim Fast, carb-cycling, together with Fitbit, simply to call a few. Also, to a greater extent than periodical tips, podcasts together with weblog articles than I tin count. All of these things gave the hope of quick weight loss together with to me, hope. But, eventually the pounds would creep dorsum on together with I'd search for the adjacent miracle.
My mass donation pile. This is non fifty-fifty a quarter of the books I've read over the years.

I similar rules together with am real practiced amongst "black together with white" concepts. Give me a listing of foods to swallow or non eat, together with I volition perform real well. So when I tell I tried these diet plans, I hateful I faithfully executed them to the letter, for months, if non years. And approximate what? I got results amongst all of them. However, what I never got was freedom. Even if I striking the destination weight, I never arrived. I never had the "bikini body" that the magazines promised. I was never satisfied together with ever strived for more. Five to a greater extent than pounds. Or ten. THEN I volition live there, together with therefore I volition live happy. 
My figure skating squad inwards Albuquerque, New Mexico.

But perfection is difficult to maintain. If I wasn't perfect to the computer programme on whatsoever given day, I would swallow whatever I wanted amongst abandon because the solar daytime was already ruined. Cue the feelings of guilt together with the hope of doing ameliorate tomorrow, or Mon or adjacent week. I've also had to a greater extent than "last suppers" than I tin count. In other words, if I'm planning to start a diet on Monday, I'd ameliorate swallow everything together with anything I tin notice earlier the restriction hits, because I'll never swallow to a greater extent than or less other cookie again. Can anyone relate? Such is the prison theatre together with unending torment inwards the caput of the dieter.
I won my segmentation at 2013 States of America Adult Figure Skating Nationals!

As yous tin see, I've spent most of my life inwards a cycle of obsession over, or fail of, my trunk together with my health. On together with on the treadmill goes, volition it ever stop? Will I ever really live free? I've asked myself these questions therefore many times over the years. I had finally resolved myself to this beingness my lot inwards life. My struggle.
Dance recital at Yokota Air Base, Japan.

But 2 years ago, Revelation Wellness entered my life together with changed everything. For the origin fourth dimension ever, I experience on my agency to freedom. Real freedom. H5N1 liberty together with peace that alone God tin give.
Dancing inwards my origin recital amongst my daughter.

It never occurred to me that the Lord cared nearly this part of my life. For to a greater extent than or less argue I disconnected this struggle amongst God. I studied my Bible, went to church, together with and therefore spent most of my waking hours obsessed nearly the adjacent best diet or work-out plan. I made the wishing for wellness together with weight loss (which tin DEFINITELY live practiced things, together with sometimes necessary) my god-thing. The thing I desired most. FOR THIRTY YEARS! 
My Marilyn Monroe number at States of America Adult Nationals.

The mantra of Revelation Wellness is Love God. Get Healthy. Be Whole. Love Others. Also, that the number of trunk obsession, or neglect, is almost never nearly the nutrient or the fitness. Instead, the number is a thing of the heart. There is ever something deeper to uncover, similar peeling dorsum the layers of an onion. It hasn't ever been slow work, but nosotros are called to produce difficult things.
I'm fighting for liberty for these two.

The Revelation Wellness message resonated amongst me therefore much, together with I desperately wanted to live salubrious together with whole, but I resisted giving upwards my nutrient rules. My rules were my safety, the house I felt inwards command together with I've had a difficult fourth dimension surrendering them. I ever idea my work was amongst food, but it wasn't until a friend suggested that I "take a interruption from dieting" for a few weeks, that the Lord revealed my work was amongst dieting. I looked to my nutrient rules to relieve me, when I should await to Him, my Savior. I realized that I don't fifty-fifty know what is "healthy" anymore, every bit I receive got ever followed the latest together with greatest diet plan. The diet fad of the solar daytime volition ever change, but He doesn't.

The Lord is capable of healing on the spot, but sometimes the healing is a procedure that must live walked out through faith. I receive got non had linear progress inwards my pursuit of freedom. There receive got been many times that I succumb to i to a greater extent than book, or i to a greater extent than weblog for answers, or i to a greater extent than "plan of attack" for quick weight loss, but the Lord is ever patient together with waits for me to come upwards dorsum when I am ready. After completion of the Bible study, The Wellness Revelation (a revised together with updated version volition live released inwards mass form, in August, 2017), I decided I was all-in! So much so, that I enrolled inwards RevWell Instructor training, non necessarily to instruct fitness classes, but generally inwards pursuit of my ain freedom.

After ix weeks of online classes, to include; Bible study, leadership training, nutrient together with nutrition guidance together with lots of fun movement, nosotros retreated to Williams, Arizona to dig deeper.
Our amazing RevWell leadership team.

Eleven strangers were forced into this small-scale cabin to produce life together for a week. Truly? This may receive got been the hardest part! (You all know how much I taste roughing it!) My daughters were super excited that I got a top bunk, though.

But later a calendar week of baring our souls, struggles together with sharing lots of laughter together with tears, nosotros became sisters. All brought together past times a mutual passion together with mission, FREEDOM! Otherwise known every bit #fitnessteachergospelpreachers.

There were 150 of us inwards all, together with nosotros prayed together, 

ate together,

studied together,

played together, 

partied together, 

but mostly, nosotros worshiped together.



Movement every bit worship. I had never connected the two. Moving my trunk for the joy of it, every bit opposed to a agency to forcefulness out calories takes everything to to a greater extent than or less other level. Seriously! I rediscovered my five-year-old, lilliputian immature lady passion; a room amongst music, displace together with choreography. My happy place. I also reclaimed my master design, that of a dancer. I've lived my entire life believing that I did non receive got what the globe called a 'dancer's body', but the Lord told me otherwise. He gave me a trunk that is notwithstanding capable of, together with loves to dance, fifty-fifty at 45 years old! I'll convey it!

And this lady, Alisa Keeton, the brave founder of Revelation Wellness, together with unbeknownst to her, my mentor for the past times 2 years, has changed my life. Because of her obedience to the Lord inwards starting this ministry, I am good on the route to freedom. And for that, I am forever grateful.
Yes, I am totally fan-girling inwards this picture!

And what a legacy! Thank yous Alisa!

It is interesting, every bit I progress on my journeying towards freedom, how lilliputian nearly nutrient or fitness this route has acquire for me. I realize amongst sorrow how my 30 yr call for for the perfect pant size has robbed me of therefore much more. I haven't been really acquaint amongst my family, together with receive got permit the number on the scale, or the bird of my diet perfection, dictate my mood for the day. It pains me to intend of the wasted years together with attempt spent chasing something that would never create total me. I'm heartbroken to await at the pictures contained inwards this blog, knowing that I felt fatty together with non practiced plenty inwards every unmarried picture. Always striving for to a greater extent than or striving for better. But God.....

His mercies together with grace are novel every day. Every. Single. Day. Even later 30 year's worth of tomorrows, His patience never waivers. Today, I scream no to a greater extent than over fourth dimension together with opportunities lost. Today, regardless of my pant size, I volition convey practiced tending of this gift that I've been given. I volition process myself amongst kindness together with convey together with abide by my trunk for what it tin do. But most importantly, today, I await towards the alone beingness who volition ever really create total together with satisfy me. Jesus

What does treating myself amongst kindness await like? 
  1.  Feed my trunk life-giving nutrient together with drink.
  2.  Leave plenty of room for fun together with celebration, without guilt.
  3. Move my trunk daily, amongst joy, because I can!
  4. Get on amongst life. That's it. The Gospel is simple, non ever easy, but simple.


Do yous wishing to lose a lot of "weight" inwards a hurry? Clean out your cupboard together with acquire rid of everything that doesn't correspond TODAY. I am non at my lowest weight, non fifty-fifty close, together with these wearing clothing stand upwards for a longing for what was, together with a faux hope for the future. I can't seat my hope or happiness in that location anymore. I am enough, correct now, as-is. There is peace inwards that.

I started this journey, partly for my ain freedom, but generally to interruption the chains for these 2 wonderful girls that the Lord has therefore graciously entrusted to my care. I don't wishing them to inherit this bondage from me. After all, they are daughters of the King. We all are, together with He has something therefore much ameliorate inwards mind!

"It is for liberty that Christ has laid us free. Stand firm, then, together with produce non permit yourselves live burdened in i lawsuit to a greater extent than past times a yoke of slavery." Galatians 5:1




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